"Gollywaddles!"
Solicitor General Gregory G. Garre (no seriously, his initials are "GGG"!) aspires to the title of Most Ridiculous Person In The World today with his impressive and absurd display of intellectual dishonesty, as quoted in the New York Times article today on the Supreme Court's reconsideration of profanity on television:
“The world that the networks are asking you to adopt here today, where the networks are free to use expletives,” said Gregory G. Garre, the solicitor general, may include “the extreme example of Big Bird dropping the F-bomb on ‘Sesame Street.’ ”
It's Big Motherfuckin' Bird, people! It's Oscar the Bitch! (No Elmo.)
Additional delights in this story abound, with the image of the supreme justices throwing around all kinds of euphemisms for common expletives, and even culminating in what I sincerely hope becomes the law of the land: Any joke is okay, as long as it's sufficiently funny.
Justice John Paul Stevens suggested a novel standard for judging indecency. Is it ever appropriate to consider, he asked, “whether the particular remark was really hilarious — very, very funny?” Mr. Garre said funniness could play a part in the commission’s analysis of whether a remark was shocking, titillating or pandering. Justice Scalia jokingly summarized the new standard: “Bawdy jokes are O.K. if they are really good.”
It is a new day, people. A new day.
As my dear mother always used to say, "You don't need to swear to be funny. But it fuckin' well doesn't hurt. Fuck."
Ok, she never said that, but HAD the Big B ever dropped the F-bomb on the S Street, I can tell you right now that my whole world view would have been a hella lot less skewed that it is already.
It's a Big Bird, man. A TALKING big bird. Like, 7 feet tall. And Solicitor General GGG is worried that the gigantic talking yellow bird swearing is the problem? Trust me: between Big B, the very very angry Oscar living in the garbage can, the cookie obsessed monster, the clearly in the closet Bert and Ernie, and (for the younger generation) the slightly simple and annoyingly ticklish Elmo, Sesame Street has a whole lot to answer for already.
It did teach me everything I know about music though. Damned fine funky pinball counting classic, anyone?
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=HgocE-JfWFI
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