Comments for Panda Joke VIII

Panda Joke VIII

2007-03-11T19:06:28Z

It's not the funniest joke in the world, but I'm very proud to have a tradition on my blog that is in its 8th annual incarnation, so here goes again: It's the Panda joke!

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down, and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun, and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the manager shouts, "Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter, and you didn't even pay for your sandwich!"

"Hey, man, I'm a PANDA"

The manager opens his dictionary and reads:

Panda:: A tree-dwelling marsupial of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves.

Here's the joke in 2006, 2005, 2004, 2003, 2002, 2001, 2000. Phew, I'm getting old!

Comment from Sameer Vasta on 2007-03-11

2007-03-11T21:39:19Z

No March is ever complete without the Panda Joke. I was waiting for it...

Comment from Yellow on 2007-03-11

2007-03-12T03:12:20Z

lol!! Took me some time to figure out the joke..

Comment from Thomas on 2007-03-12

2007-03-12T07:04:07Z

A duck walks into a bar for the third time in a week and asks the bartender, "Do you have any grapes?"

The bartender replies, "No, we don't. You've come in and asked three times already. If you come in here again and ask for grapes I'm going to nail your bill to the bar!" The duck looks dejected and leaves.

The next day he comes into the bar and sits down but doesn't say anything. After a long moment the bartender asks him, "What do you want?"

The duck asks, "Do you have any nails?"

The bartender looks confused and then gets petulant, "No, what the hell, no I don't have any nails?"

And the duck asks, "Then do you have any grapes?"

Comment from Jason on 2007-03-12

2007-03-12T13:02:36Z

Sadly, you don't quite have the joke right. In the form you've presented, the dictionary entry is correct. "Eats shoots and leaves" describes what the panda eats. However, there is/was/someone thought there was an entry in a dictionary that read "eats, shoots and leaves." The comma changes the "shoots and leaves" from a description of what the panda eats into a list of what the panda does. He eats, then he shoots, then he leaves.

Now that I've ruined the joke with my pedantry, I'll still thank you for posting it.

Comment from Jeff Ventura on 2007-03-12

2007-03-12T13:11:05Z

That presents better in writing than I think it would in person.

Thanks Anil. I can welcome April with open arms now.

Comment from MMM on 2007-03-12

2007-03-12T15:02:40Z

lol... Always a good joke... I read it in the book "Eats, shoots and Leaves" by Lynne Truss.

Comment from Jarrod on 2007-03-12

2007-03-12T20:47:38Z

I retold this joke today, thinking it was a sure-fire winner, and sadly, no one laughed.

Comment from Adam on 2007-03-12

2007-03-13T02:55:10Z

Anil, Have you seen the book "Eats, Shoots & Leaves"? That very joke is in the introduction!
Happy Panda Joke Day,
Adam