Panda Joke V
March 12, 2004
One of this site's annual traditions is that I post the Panda Joke each year when I'm away for SXSW. So here goes:
A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down, and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun, and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the manager shouts, "Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter, and you didn't even pay for your sandwich!"
"Hey, man, I'm a PANDA!" the panda shouts back. "Look it up!"
The manager opens his dictionary and reads:
Panda: A tree-dwelling marsupial of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves.
Now that that's out of the way, if you're in Austin, I hope I'll see you tomorrow at KICK! and on Monday at the Blogging Next panel.
11:09 PM
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I know a slightly earthier version of that one involving a wombat, an woman, and the definition 'Eats roots and leaves.'
Have fun!
At least it's not as bad as the cowboy with the cat and the cow patty.
Are you aware that the punchline of this joke is the name of a great new book on punctuation?
Actually, the title of Lynne Truss' book includes a strategically placed comma: 'Eats, Shoots & Leaves'.
I'm not sure if that extra comma is just something Lynne placed there herself, or if she's referring to an actual historical typo. I don't remember her mentioning this anywhere in the book.
I think Ms. Truss' placing the comma there is simply her way of referring to the joke, not an "historical typo".
That's almost as funny as this joke:
Q: What do you call a fish without an eye?
a: Fssssssssssssssssh! (Say it out loud)
I just came across Ms. Truss' book today, and it actually has a version of the joke on the back cover. It's basically the same, but it says something like:
‘The panda throws a poorly punctuated wildlife book to the manager who opens it up and reads …
Panda: A tree-dwelling marsupial of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats, shoots and leaves.’
The punctuation is important (if you're a stickler).
Sorry, Anil but the Panda joke doesn't get any funnier, please think about changing it for next year. You have over 350 days to think of a new one. I don't mind if it still involves pandas.
That's like saying Christmas doesn't get any more meaningful! It's not about the ha-ha, it's about the tradition.
Anonymous..the joke is funny, it's just a joke you have to look at for a bit in order to laugh. Changing the Panda Joke is like Santa wearing green all of a sudden.
Sorry, I posted the 'anonymous' message above
Traditions change over time though?! I'm sure people celebrated Christmas differently 200 years ago (less flashy presents, more oranges and lumps of coal). How about making the tradition a more general 'heres-another-joke-about-Pandas'? That way I have something to look forward to each year, what with there being a surprise element and stuff...
bug report: The "KICK" logo looks like "KKK".
likewise, ive heard it with a koala and a prostitue - eats bush and leaves. ;)
It is mentioned in the first few pages of her book AFAIR. Definitely need the comma or it is not really funny :)