Another in my occasional series of great emails sent to our customer service address at work:
From: [Name Redacted]
Sent: Thursday, November 07, 2002 2:18 PM
Subject: why won't you respond to my help request?
i signed up for [service] three days ago and have received NO (0) [service] yet.
worse, i emailed you a help request, and you didn't even bother to respond.
a) please answer my questions
b) what the hell is your problem?
please respond to this message IMMEDIATELY